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Luckily, patterns can be used to disguise bumps or make them appear less noticeable. The site promises no gimmicks and no hidden charges. Opening up to your partner will, in fact, make your relationship stronger. Even if this is new to us too, we would much rather be the ones to address being transgender with you. If the girl in question is a software engineer, you should probably ask her about that. If your chest does protrude, you should invest in a good binder to flatten it. So I have had girlfriends before when I identified as gay. This is because they can be used to camouflage any bumps on your chest.

Winter LaMon is a 28-year-old transgender man who lives in New York City. He joined the online dating site OKCupid six years ago, about three years before he transitioned. He dates men and women, both transgender and cisgender a term for people who aren't trans. While some have criticized OKCupid for showing people false or manipulated content as an experiment, the site's failure to accommodate transgender users may be a larger and more long-standing ethical dilemma. In 2013, an online petition asking OKCupid to accommodate trans and genderqueer people received more than 1,000 signatures. From the beginning, she knew it was important to allow people to identify as queer and transgender in their profiles. The other Mesh founders, who are straight men, agreed. Mesh, which is in pre-beta, allows users to identify as male, female, transman, transwoman, or non-binary—a person who doesn't identify as male or female. Categories for sexual orientation are straight, gay, bisexual, or queer. Users can also tell Mesh if they are interested in meeting men, women, or everyone. Like OKCupid, Mesh has an algorithm that helps determine compatibility. But the site also gets really deep into matching. This has the potential to make online dating more thorough and more fruitful, but safety and acceptance for trans people who date online may take more than an algorithm. LaMon prefers to be out about his gender with potential dates. He thinks people will figure it out anyway when they meet him. But not every transgender person wants to be this open. Colleen, who asked that we not use her real name, is a 30-year-old transgender woman who has been dating online since she was a teenager. She's in a monogamous relationship now, but before she fell in love she had an OKCupid profile that identified her as a straight woman. Typically, she discloses after she's gotten to know someone. Soon after Colleen made a profile on OKCupid she agreed to a date—just to test out the site. She and the guy hadn't had much communication, and she assumed he was mostly interested in hooking up. The man turned around and walked out the door.

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